Jolene Philo's Blog Archives 2010
Mar 4, 2010 - 12:25:24 AM
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Handwriting
February 16, 2010
Jolene Philo
I nearly overlooked it until my father’s name in the return address corner caught my eye. I pulled the paper from the envelope and unfolded it. It was a letter from Dad to Mom, a love letter written a few weeks before they were married. Sweet as it was to find a record of their romance, though Dad wrote more about travel plans and crop reports than undying love, a sadder sweetness touched me as I stared at the paper.
My father’s handwriting. This was my father’s handwriting.
In all the years of my childhood, I’d never seen Dad dash a quick note, write a check, or sign a birthday card for his wife or children. Multiple sclerosis had affected him swiftly after his diagnosis at age twenty-nine. By the time he was thirty-one and I was four, he could no longer write easily or legibly. To my all-or-nothing father, the only choice he felt he had was to abandon writing. This man who talked as naturally as he breathed and wrote as easily as he talked never picked up a pen again.
In my hands lay proof of who my father had been before his disease, before his rapid descent into disability, before the depression that often accompanies multiple sclerosis robbed him of the confidence and determination needed to persevere.
The letter is one of my most prized possessions. It’s a poignant reminder of what was, and an urgent reminder of what remains to be done. Soon, very soon, I need to write letters to my children, not on the computer but in my own hand, telling them how courageous and creative they are, what joy they have given their father and me, and how much we love them, now and forever.
My father couldn’t write such letters to me, but I can write them to my children. One day, I think, they will treasure such a gift. It’s time for me to pick up my pen.
Jolene Philo
www.DifferentDream.com
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All Children Can Learn, Given Enough Time
February 2, 2010
Jolene Philo
One of the stories in my book, A Different Dream for My Child: Meditations for Parents of Critically or Chronically Ill Children, mentions a boy named Josh. He was born with a cleft palate and a chin that receded so severely his food would not go down his esophagus properly. After years of corrective surgeries on his palate and chin, living with a trach, and receiving nutrition through a feeding tube, he was able to take food by mouth.
Learning to eat was a challenge for Josh and so was learning to speak. In fact, for a long time, he didn’t talk. He pointed to things and made sounds, but that was all. A few years ago however, things began to change. Josh learned a few words, then a few phrases. Still, with twenty-five years of educational experience under my belt, I doubted that he would ever carry on a normal conversation.
Yesterday, I sat next to Josh, now eight, at a potluck after church. He looked at me and said, “Hi, Mrs….um, what’s your name?”
“Mrs. Philo,” I answered, “but you can call me Jolene.”
“Hi, Jolene.” A baby wailed, and Josh looked around. “Why is that baby crying? What’s wrong?”
I tried not to stare as Josh’s eyes searched for the baby. The progress he had made since the last time we visited was nothing short of miraculous. When he skipped off to find the crying infant, I remembered a maxim often repeated by the special education colleagues I worked with during my teaching years.
All children can learn, given enough time.
Obviously, Josh’s teachers and therapists believe and practice that philosophy, and what a difference they’ve made in his life. Maybe it’s time for me to reinstate the philosophy, too.
I do believe all children can learn, given enough time.
How about you?
Jolene Philo
www.DifferentDream.com
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Extraordinary Measures
January 20, 2010
By: Jolene Philo
When I first saw the trailer for Extraordinary Measures, squeezed in amongst a host of others at the theater, I barely noticed it. The film didn’t make it onto my radar screen until Scott Newport, a former EParent blogger who recently lost his son to Noonan’s Syndrome, sent this email.
Even though we can’t bring Evan back we can take steps to make his life and others like him impact the world in a special way. One way to do this is to help those who helped us, to empower them to make a difference in lives of children with incurable diseases.
There is a movie coming out called Extraordinary Measures with Harrison Ford. On their website they have an opportunity for our children to make a difference by way of video story. If his video wins we can give back $10,000 to those who helped us keep Evan alive for almost eight years.
Just go to this link and his video is the one with me holding a wooden mallet.
extraordinarymeasuresthemovie.com/#/quilt
But even after following Scott’s instructions and voting for Evan’s cause (which by the way you can do once a day), I wasn’t as excited about the movie as I should have been. The excitement came today, not after watching the movie’s trailer, but after clicking on the “About John Crowley” button I hadn’t noticed before, and listening to the parents who inspired the story behind the film.
Now I’m so excited to see the movie, I can hardly wait until it’s release date on January 22, 2010. If you want to see what has me so excited and inspired, go to this link,
extraordinarymeasuresthemovie.com/#/johncrowley and listen to John and Aileen Crowley tell their story.
Prepare to be amazed by what two determined parents can do.
See you in the popcorn line,
Jolene Philo
www.DifferentDream.com
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Do You Want to be a Work-At-Home Parent?
January 6, 2010
By: Jolene Philo
A few months ago, I participated in a blog tour for a new book called So You Want to be a Work-At-Home Mom by Jill Hart and Diana Ennen. Since then I've met many moms of special needs kids who’ve mentioned a desire to work from home. But they don't know where to start. So I tell them about the book and its authors. Since most of the you visit eparent.com because you’re dads and moms of special needs kids, you might like to know more, too.
Jill Hart
One of the authors, Jill Hart, is a friend of mine. After her first child was born, Jill created her own home business and is now a recognized expert in the field. Her website,
www.cwahm.com, is full of information for parents who want to work at home. You can also sign up for her free weekly email newsletter at the website.
Diana Ennen
Though I don't know Dianna, the advice she gives in So You Want to be a Work-At-Home Mom about how to become a "virtual assistant" makes me wish positions like that had been available when my kids were little. Her story of how she launched her career as a VA is both interesting and inspiring.
New Year's Resolution
If you're a parent who’s made a resolution to work at home in 2010, this book can help you reach your goal. It’s easy to read and full of resources and real-life stories of how the authors began their businesses and sustain them. Though it’s not written specifically for parents of special needs kids, the information applies to any parent who wants to work from home. And, Dads, don’t let the title stop you. The information in this book can help men and women. So check it out and see what you think.
Best wishes as you work toward your goals in 2010!
Jolene Philo
www.DifferentDream.com
Jolene’s book, A Different Dream for My Child, was released on September 1, 2009 by Discovery House Publishers. It’s available for purchase at her website
www.jolenephilo.com
To view Jolene's most recent and past postings go to:
www.eparent.com/resources_blogs/Jolene_Philo.asp
www.eparent.com/resources_blogs/Jolene_Philos_Blog_Archives_2009.asp
www.eparent.com/resources_blogs/Jolene_Philos_Blog_Archives_2008.asp
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